Breakdowns On Campus: Students On The Edge

Breakdowns On Campus: Students On The Edge


Today’s Friday.I look like shit, I feel like shit,
I’ve had a shit week.
This module is set out
so bloody stupid!
Say hello.So we’re just chilling in the rain.CAT MEOWSI know. Are you stressed as well?I feel like I’m in, like,
uncharted territory at the moment.
You know, I’ve never had to deal
with self harm before.
I’ve never had to deal withgenuinely planning to end my life.For now, it’s just
keeping myself safe.
And unfortunately,
university kind of has to…
..take a bit of a back seat.You know, I…I could finish my course now but I
might not be around for graduation.
I’ve got deadlines.
I’ve got a presentation next week.
It’s just like, all too much.Like today I was struggling
so much when I was watching
people’s presentations, because
they were so good, like,
I just couldn’t focus and my brain
was just not allowing me to process.
Like, and I’ve got an exam
coming up. Do not do well in exams.
Is any of this going in?Ken. Is any of this going in?I can’t… It’s just not…I’m having a meltdown.I’m very positive today,
which is not, not like me, so…
So, I’m walking to work.I’m hella fucking depressed
right now, like,
I could actually put
someone’s head through a wall.
Now I’ve got to go and sit at
a fucking desk for four hours.
I’m just… Fucking hell!There’s someone behind me
so I look like a fucking moron,
walking around with my phone out,someone else, they’re going to look
at me like I’m fucking crazy.
So, just quickly, I’m really,
really happy because I just got
another first on my uni assignment,so I’m really proud of myself
because it’s a lot of hard work
and it’s put me in a really
good mood while I’m at work.
Makes me more positive to do,
to do the other four assignments
that I’ve got to do
in the next three weeks.
This is really hard to film this,but I promised I’d be honest.I’m just so fucking broke
and I don’t know what to do.
I’m really fucking hurting.I’m, like, so alone.No-one listens, like,no-one checks up on me.No-one tries, like…I’ve literally been, there’s so many
signs about how bad I’ve been
struggling and no-one’s done shit.I just… I just don’t…I just hate this.I just don’t want to…I wish I could just fuck off
for a while and just…
..just not do it, just not…You know,
I’m glad my overdose failed.
I’m glad I’m here,
I’m alive, I’m well.
I’m glad I’m getting help
from professionals, my family,
my friends and everyone around me.SHE KNOCKSDOOR OPENSHello!You all right?
You all right? I’m good, thanks.
Did you get the bus?
I’ve missed you.
Of course I got the bus!Hi.Hello, Amy.You all right?Yeah, you?I missed you.Did you?Oh, get your fucking freezing hands
off me!
Those cakes look nice.We’ve got dinner first.Oh, Prosecco.People always say, like, “Oh,
it’s the best years of your life,
“you’ll have so much fun,
party, party, party”, but then
they don’t mention,
like, the social pressure,
there’s the pressure to
join teams and be part of things
and you’ve got, like,
your work pressure
and then your living arrangements
and then your student loan and
balancing money and finding a job
and it’s just like, so difficult.
Sometimes you just need to
let someone else care for you,
you know, instead of struggling.That’s not funny.That’s very grim.Like, this has been
just the most intense year,
but amazing year, and I’ve learned
so much about others, myself,
and especially about
reaching out for help when I need it
and knowing when I need to get help,but also being strong for myself.I’m so excited for next year,
like, I can’t wait.
I’m going to be moving to a house,
like, it’s going to be amazing.
I love my course, I love my friends,
I love the area, I just…
I can’t wait.I got a letter
through the post today
confirming my extension
for my degree.
Everyone else is obviously
getting their results.
I don’t really know how
I’m going to deal with everyone,
like, graduating,
and wearing their gowns
and everyone’s getting fitted
for those hat things, and…
SHE GROANSIt’s a shame.All those wild times that
I bounded my dissertation! Oh…
Those were the good old days, eh?I’m getting support.I’m glad that
I still persevered with…
..believing that I was worth help.I was on my way to
a hospital appointment
and I found a man
lying on the floor.
It basically turned out that
he’d tried to commit suicide.
It was hard to see
the amount of pain that he was in
because I’ve been there.It was a shock and it was hard.I told him that he needs to
let people help him.
It made me think that
his life was valuable
and that
that wasn’t the answer for him,
and it made me realise that
it wasn’t the answer for me either,
and I’m glad that I’m still here.It’s so important to talk to people.Because help is out there.

100 Replies to “Breakdowns On Campus: Students On The Edge

  1. I'm a 17 year old lad in my final year of A levels and im feeling increasing levels of sadness every day it feels like and I don't know if I have a mental illness or not. Like sometime I will use the word depressed and be partially serious but I tell myself I can't be actually depressed surely. Feel like lads can't tell others they are depressed because we live in a world where it's weird for lads to be "depressed" at this age.

  2. This documentary speaks to me like nothing else before. I am happy to know that both these girl are alive, it gives me hope

  3. Keep turning to and leaning on Jesus. He really does value you. How much do you need to go through without believing He cares.

    Study Him-His Word. Follow It. (He will help you.)

    You can’t please everyBody, but you can please Him because He depends on Him(self), and not you or anyone else. He works through us, if we allow Him. He runs the world, and it’s easier to allow Him.

  4. Let’s be honest there’s no point in doing some of these “degrees” might as well just get bang on that crack

  5. Uni shouldn’t be made easier because a few can’t cope with the stress – no one has to go to uni, no degree is going to be easy everyone knows that. If you know you can’t cope with stress don’t go.

  6. They could do the open university as you can work at home and whilst the course may last longer it’s not usually as heavy on

  7. University is supposed to set you up for the real world. Yes you need support for mental health and it's best to get it early for those with recognised conditions, but although it may sound insensitive, for those saying they need someone to take care of them (Or implying anyone else should share responsibility for their mental health) They are setting themselves up to leave uni in to the real world completely unprepared for how harsh the professional jobs that many will be aiming for are going to be. There needs to be mental health support in university focused on preparing you for the far less empathetic world beyond the campus walls. Obviously I don't mean those with psychiatric conditions that require constant medication and monitoring but those with conditions where self help is effective.

  8. My experience of dealing with sht:
    Had depression for years, got through GCSE's with no revision or work not even last minute revision, just sat through lessons with my head in a blank space and this numb feeling all over pretty much hearing static and daydreaming into other worlds, but I still got good grades because I never found subjects difficult. Did A-Levels and my depression worsened and I just did not care at all, still attended but by then I just entirely shut down and was on auto-pilot, did the work talked as usual but my attention just wasn't there, it was as if I was locked in my thoughts and I genuinely didn't care whether I failed in the A-Level exams or not because I couldn't see myself living past that point in time, as expected I didn't do well in the exams although I still passed and met all the requirements I needed to attend the University course I had planned to attend since I decided on my career path when researching my GCSE options. Then I just took some time, just to think and relax and plan and focus on one thing. I focused on only one thing for months. I focused on myself and nothing else. The first year of university went by in a flash and I didn't get to do anything I planned to do but as soon as it ended, in the 6 months of break, I made my plans a reality, I was sick of living so I mended each aspect of my life slowly, one by one, piece by piece, starting with my thoughts, I kept my mind strong and my thoughts clear. As soon as a dark thought occurred I'd visualize that I had incinerated it, any self doubt and I'd tell myself that I know all the doubt is what's false, my strength is real, it is from those who love me and kept me going, and although I love them and they kept me here, I needed to do this for myself so I had to live for my own sake rather than will myself to continue for fear of letting down others. I was discontent with my very essence, who I was, so I reshaped myself, my personality, my emotional state, my health, my relationships, my mind, my will. I chose to burn away all the negative, any bad thought would be met with self-management, I'd imagine losing a finger or limb to make the thoughts dissappear, no more talking about myself or others aggressively or negatively. I calmed myself first and foremost my taking in and being there every waking moment rather than waking moving and fading back to sleep each day, I had to live each day to appreciate my self and my surroundings. I got a part-time job at a large shop, handling luggage, both the physical aspects and interacting with people from all over the world as I'm in central London, I began to control my health rather than leave it to chance, improving my levels of exercise and my diet by being intensely active for 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, 3 months and reducing my intake of unhealthy foods as well as my excessive portions of home meals while increasing my hydration. I had been thin in the first place but I had lost fat and gained muscle as well as tone so I felt much better physically. I could breathe as if it was for the first time. I took each and every moment to appreciate the beauty in everything around me, as if it was the first time I'd seen it all, trees, sunsets, animals, people smiling, helping customers and receiving their thanks for a genuine service made my day. After that I felt capable of trying to form fresh bonds with all of my close friends, I realized my friendships had become stale and rough and disconnected although I still saw them regularly, so I let them know about the changes I'd made to my way of being, and I let them know my feelings and thoughts and that I'd moved on from my past and I was now a new person, that I was sorry for all of my mistakes but that I had forgiven myself because I knew I was a new person, and I became the kind of friend that they would love, that mattered, I no longer felt left out despite being in their company and them trying hard to include me, I no longer had those thoughts to cloud my mind and hold me back, as people nowadays always want the perfect person to find them but they never try to be that person. I try to be myself now, because I'm a new person after going through all my these battles with my mind, I love my life and my self and my friends and family because I tried and fought so hard, my friends love me for me because now I know who I am, I don't have to pretend to be anything. I hope you can all do the same.
    Ps. My best advice would be to fight and never stop fighting for your own self. If you feel you need it, if you even can feel that dim lingering feeling of hope fading, never be afraid to get professional help.
    Whether or not others help you, the best person to fight against the dark and fight for a new day is you. So stay strong.

  9. I just wanted to give them both a big hug it's difficult to see when it's all too familiar. These issues occur when high achievers set the bar so high that when they fall short its failure and rather than allow that human moment of weakness it's forced to the back with the rest of it untill it overloads. I used to be the kinda of hard nosed guy that would say to myself crack on and get on with it and man up which only filled up the bottle. Cause when I had a chat and allowed myself a moment of weakness I did that anyway.

  10. This is why They should change The school system, It is seriously so fucked up how so many people have to go thru things like this, myself included:/

  11. Also to those concerned with no guys being here it really doesn't matter cause I'm a guy in male dominated high stress environment and the result is the same.

  12. If this doesn't show the seriousness of mental health in university I don't understand what will. I unfortunately wasn't able to finish uni due to how badly mine was getting. It got to a point I would get panic attacks on the way to lectures and turn home. So many things were wrong in my life and uni was a major reason for so much animosity towards myself! I hated myself for so long because I couldn't finish uni. But it's taken me 5 years to actually be okay with it and I hope everyone who is suffering from MH no matter how small/big it is all you should do is talk. Find someone anyone and just express how you feel. A lot of students bottle it all in and honestly that's what can destroy you

  13. No suprise that there were no males on this…yet they have the highest suidcide rates under 45. Yes mental health affects both genders but to not have them both on a programme like this is poor, Thumbs down from me.

  14. Until today I thought I was just having a bad day or it was just a mood swing that was making me cry every other night. But now seeing Amy’s side of story I’ve realised that I have problem with my mental health and will definitely be seeking help from others.

  15. I remember suffering terribly with depression and social anxiety in my first year. I opened up about my mental health and it was not taken seriously and was threatened to be kicked out for low attendance.

  16. Yes. I can definitely relate to this. I don't suffer as badly as them or have strong desires to kill myself but I can still relate. Sometimes I ask myself whats the point in even trying and sometimes I just think that the stuff i'm learning is useless. Sometimes I dread having to get on the bus in the morning for school and be around all these people. My social anxiety also makes school dreadful for me but i'm starting to slowly get away from feeling really anxious around people.

  17. I would suggest before you run off to uni you spend a couple of years finding out who you are really and working a few jobs. Uni will always be there. Way to many students end up in jobs they don’t do well. Kids today need to develop some mental toughness.

  18. This is actually very hard for me to watch. The pressures of college got too much for me. This was me every day for an year until I completely broke. It was a very dark time in my life. My dad suffered with schizophrenia, so I feel hyper sensitive to mental illness. Thankfully, I got through and I came out with more understanding of what people go through and the pressures that are placed on us.

  19. I love how this series basically encompasses everything I've encountered either myself or from other people whilst at university

  20. One of the most important documentaries out there.
    I dropped out of university due to bad mental health. I was my own worst enemy and I believe many more are to themselves. I had to get out the boxy flat I was staying in but with nothing to do in a new area, I would just spend money on needless food and random junk, plus drink way to much for some sort of fun. This also had really negative effects on my mental health. I am stronger than most and never considered suicide (luckily) but I dropped out and moved back home with my mother which was the best thing for me. As Amy said, sometimes you just need someone to take care of you for a while. I was scrambled and didn't want to talk or see anyone. Even seeing close friends made me feel embarrassed and shy. My mother being the way she is, forced me to get a part time job within about 2 months. Which was difficult for me at the start but helped me build myself back up. From then on I grafted and progressed to where I am today with a full time career and different qualifications on my way. Without University. I am very proud of myself.
    I am not 100% and never will be, but I'm okay with that and everyday I live and I learn. Even though I've always known this information. It's the first time I've written it down and shared it, But it feels good and I hope it encourages others to share their stories too.
    The message given in this video and the message I want to promote is: If you aren't feeling right, don't fight the feelings. I forced myself to stay in University longer than I should have and made myself worse and worse in the process. If its time to go home, do it. If its time to quit your job, do it. Sometimes a brief reminder that you can quit your job and get a new one reminds you of how nice and simple life can be.

  21. These people value a stupid degree more than their lives? They clearly don't know what they are doing, just brainwashed by others. Don't get me wrong, I too have a degree, but thinking about it, I really shouldn't be having a degree, because I find it useless.

  22. It's genuinly scary how many people are suffering from bad mental health at uni. most people I've known at uni have experienced some form of poor mental health and 3 friends have dropped out or taken years out because of it.

  23. I'm doing my GCSEs right now and honestly its so hard i don't know what to do about it. Like i just can't understand any of it and i feel like everybody else does and i can't remember any of the work. I don't try in my homework, like i'll do it but not to a good standard because i don't see the point, the only thing my teachers care about are my exam results and its becoming way too overwhelming. The only exam i want to do well in is maths but my maths teacher only teaches us lower topics when we are supposed to be doing higher. I hate going to school, i dread it every morning and completing one day feels like an accomplishment. I don't want to go to Uni because i know how hard the work is going to be and i wouldn't be able to do it. Im just so fed up with school and the pressures of it.

  24. I made myself study in the hope that when I graduate my life would take a turn for the better… but in the end I realized I don't even want to work in that field

  25. Amy definitely has bipolar disorder she needs help before it’s to late and she ends up hurting herself hope she gets the help she needs ❤️

  26. I don’t see why people who aren’t going to uni to do things like medicine or you know an actual degree even bother with it. It’s really not worth the stress

  27. Thank you for this BBC. My depression has been very difficult to manage at university and I've been rejected help by my doctor countless times as they just call me 'home sick'.

  28. TIME FOR THIS UNNECESSARY SUFFERING TO STOP: For the attention of the program produces. Dear Sir's. All this suffering is completely unacceptable and totally unnecessary. I have developed a revolutionary, fast, easy, permanent, solution to all of those young people's problems. And I CHALLENGE YOU to let me help them URGENTLY. Free of charge if I have to. And then make a follow-uP documentary charting their improvements. Showing them living calm, happy, productive lives, coping with whatever comes up and genuinely enjoying every day. Their unnecessary suffering is simply not acceptable. Please take a look at the testimonials on my website and you will see how fast people are getting incredible results with serious long-standing issues, Please don't ignore my comments, for god sake, these young people need and deserve our help now. Kindest regards, Julian Robus at www.HappyOnionLiving.com

  29. Lauren has something that inspires me. The clips she captured are stunning. She could consider doing something in the movie/documentary field. I bet she is also creative in other ways.

  30. this is so relatable being a final year student but that social pressure thing is a no. sure it's good to go to uni and make friends, however, going to uni, the ultimate goal should be getting a degree. so attend one or two social events, or however many you are comfortable with but don't let anyone pressure you into doing anything you are not comfortable with

  31. This is SO important. My personal story is very similar to Amy's. When you're in your first year, you just think you have to wear this brave front in order to get people to like you because you don't want to be seen as weak, but that's not the reality. After everything just reached it's lowest point last year, and I finally did begin to reach out and open up to people, was then finally the moment that my trust began to develop for the friends that I have know. This is SO important, my advice to anyone suffering at the moment at university is to talk to your tutor, talk to your lecturer, talk to someone on your course, put yourself out there, join a society, don't isolate yourself because you are suffering, people are alot less judgmental than you think, and honestly they are probably feeling like they need someone to talk too back

  32. Going through this now. So isolating especially when everyone is telling you it’s the best time of your life and just to have fun but some days you can’t leave your room at all and don’t speak to anyone.

  33. This really does make me feel less alone about feeling so horrible (currently recovering from Anorexia Nervosa) and trying to complete uni at the same time

  34. this video needs to go viral. it is absolutely insane that we allow ourselves to get consumed by acedemia while letting it dictate our worth as a human being. fuck societal norms, fuck expectations from others. you don't need a college education to be classified as "credible" or "successful". do what makes YOU happy, because in the end, you are the only person who feels whats inside of you.

  35. why the fuck would you go to university then? you know what your getting into yet you complain everyday it makes no sense.

  36. At Sheffield University’s School of East Asian Studies you always hear stories of students getting bullied by lecturers off the courses because of mental health problems holding back their progress, happened to me recently, disgusting really

  37. I hate when people use having a mental breakdown as some sort of relatable joke when it’s serious and this is it….

  38. I remember I was so stressed with school I did the same but nothing happened so I woke up and went to school acted like nothing happened no one still knows

  39. It's so sad to see how this affects people. It must be said that university is not for everyone. It shouldn't be the next pathway for people after college. It's academically challenging and that reflects the grades. There also needs to be a clearly defined line between sadness and depression. Though they are interlinked, depression is a serious cognitive and wellbeing concern. Whereas sadness is triggered by certain events. One should not study for the sake of studying, but through genuine interest. This furthers the cognitive stimulation and breeds hormones which reflect the students emotional state. Therefore if you're studying something you genuinely enjoy, results and your wellbeing will be reflected in the same positive manner.
    Depression needs to be in the spotlight to help these students in their current situation but also test students before going to university in order to assess whether they have the cognitive ability to cope with the demands of furthering their academic careers.
    Though much of these points are up for debate, it's crucial to understand another perspective which delves further than just pure emotions of an individual.

  40. One thing I feel that is another problem with university is how they don’t accommodate for those who aren’t in accommodation. I am a first year who commutes and it wastes about 4 hours of my day, and nobody cares or considers it. Yes it was my choice but it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have support and acknowledgement just because I’m not on campus. And as for the loneliness, I feel like it’s lonelier to be a commuter than someone in accommodation. Freshers for me was terrible, everyone had someone to hang with and it was difficult to infiltrate that bc everyone’s already established themselves with people. Uni is still lonely, and it’s getting harder by the day. I’ve always coped (and never felt like life was too difficult) but I’m really struggling and there’s nothing I can do.

  41. A lot of these people have mental illnesses before heading to university so is anyone really surprised? They might have felt this way if they had started working instead, or done something else. Yes university isn't for everyone but you can't blame further education for people that are already ill

  42. This Uni wow sounds so depressing honestly no worth it at all life about happiness period no of this matters your life lot more valuable

  43. As someone who suffers from severe depression here’s advice for any future students…..STAY AWAY FROM BOURNEMOUTH UNIVERSITY! Never met such uncaring scumbags in my life, even with medical evidence they wouldn’t let me resit one unit I had missed due to my illness, wanted me to wait a whole year and pay an extra £3000 just to retake one test. This is the kind of support you receive from evil money grubbing businesses like universities (which is all they really are these days thanks to the Torys)

  44. I relate to amy so much, some days I’m really good and Some days, I’m really bad to the point, I just found myself crying in the middle of the night, walking on campus and basically a lot . It hurts even more knowing that I’m trying and I have no one to talk to talk.
    And like Lauren, sometimes I wish I could just stop work and school altogether

  45. Mental health is very important and I applaud bbc for documenting the struggles that these people go through however, I feel like this video was made to feel pity not to appreciate how strong these people actually are that’s the only thing that really aggravated me. I have severe OCD and dyslexia but I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE WANT TO PITY ME! See that I’m strong and very intelligent to come out on top despite all my issues I’m still at uni that should be celebrated as an achievement! Sorry I just hate to be made as a victim to others.
    I AM NOT A VICTIM I AM A VICTOR!

  46. when I was at Lancaster University between 2003 and 2006 you didn’t even know what depression was. All you knew was you felt awful and didn’t know how to cope. The counsellors were sarcastic and there was very little or no support which led me to drop out of my course. This was the best thing! I’m now a successful violin teacher living in London and am back studying for a BA degree.

  47. I suffered terribly and wasn’t able to complete my degree. This was 15 years ago. I didn’t think anyone went through this too. I thought I was the only one. Felt like a failure since then.

  48. 210% increase in mental health in 5 years! The stress of degrees have exacerbated these individuals mental health that was there before they started uni.
    Surely they knew this?
    I hope they find peace in their lives

  49. the workplace expectations got higher so universities give their students these horrible workload. realistically, in my place (i study in design school and i have no close friends in my major so i work alone most of the time), the students help each other or ask someone to help with their assignments

  50. I've travelled six hours on a bus and booked into a hotel and I've just realised my interview tomorrow at 9 am is taking place 20 minutes from my house. Things are finally coming up for old Gil

  51. A university degree is NEVER worth getting a mental illness or making your mental illness worse than it already is. PERIOD. Quitting university was the best decision I ever made for my mental health and well-being.

  52. As an international student I can vouch all that stress is real and it gets u. Now imagine all of that plus: being thousands of miles away from home, English not being your first language, struggling to make friends and many others more stuff. Bare in mind as well that most of have a COMPLETE different education background so coming here and adjusting to the education system is a whooole another struggle 😂.
    Honestly you guys are so fortunate to be home you have no idea.

  53. Many of you comment, "just drop out of University", but that's not a luxury many international students can afford. International students pay tens of thousands of dollars per semester to study at those Universities. Their parents sold their house and invested everything they had to their child's future. They can't just suddenly quit.

  54. God bless you Lauren and love you from the bottom of my heart
    I understand you but you should be stronger and you are strong
    Love you so much ❤️

  55. UK students waiting up to three months for mental health care
    University data shows long delays, raising fears young people’s mental welfare will decline in the interim
    https://www.theguardian.com/society/2019/sep/16/uk-students-waiting-up-to-three-months-for-mental-health-care

    Abuse can come in many forms:

    DISCRIMINATION
    treating someone differently because of age, sex, race, colour, religion, medical condition, etc

    HARASSMENT
    persistent, unwanted contact face-to-face, over the phone, text or social media

    PHYSICAL
    when someone is hurt by being hit, slapped, bitten, chocked

    VERBAL
    name calling or saying nasty things

    NEGLECT

    CONTROLLING BEHAVIOUR
    telling you what/when to do things, who to talk or see

    SEXUAL
    when someone touches your body particularly your private parts without your consent

    BEING FORCED INTO MARRIAGE OR A RELATIONSHIP

    DOMESTIC ABUSE

    EMOTIONAL
    intimidation, insults, threats, humiliation, excluding or ignoring – things that make you feel stressed or sad

    FINANCIAL
    taking your money or possession without consent or bullying you in it (for the satisfaction of being pleased and being in control of you)

    There some other forms of abuse.

    COERCION
    /kəʊˈəːʃ(ə)n/
    noun
    the action or practice of persuading someone to do something by using force or threats.
    synonyms: force, compulsion, constraint, duress, oppression, enforcement, harassment, intimidation, threats, insistence, demand, arm-twisting, pressure, pressurization, influence

  56. Going to admit a week away from Uni.. I am so stressed and my anxiety cannot help me decide if I want to go Uni. Really cannot deal i've been at this stage for 7 years… I really cant right now I want to go :/

  57. University is not for everyone. It's a high pressure environment which is designed to teach you about time management and durability. Not everyone is suited and this should be reflected in a cognitive test before attending.

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